Couples Work

Transforming Emotional Habits: A Mindfulness Based Approach

One of the most rewarding, transformative and challenging experiences available to us as humans is the path of conscious, intimate relationship. Intimate relationship tends to activate core psychological material in a manner that few other experiences do. It is precisely because of this power that there is so much potential for pain or transformation.

My work with couples involves a mutual study of the relationship from a living systems perspective. This means that each partner is somehow holding important pieces in the equation. Through the use of mindfulness, couples are able to dip below the waterline of “everyday consciousness” to discover unresolved core material which is likely to be at play in many interactions. Resolution begins to occur in the present moment through attuned witnessing and support. This sets the ground for further experimentation in new ways of relating to each other.

Through experiential therapy, couples can begin to examine the powerful forces at play in relationship, which remaining unaddressed, directly undermine greater intimacy and fulfillment. Identifying the outdated scripts, and the deeper needs that tend to drive relationship, couples can begin to negotiate what they truly long for, understand how to move towards that, and begin to choose more effective behaviors in their interactions with one another.